My own first f/f relationship wasn't AS complicated because it wasn't a three-way, but I definitely recognize a lot of it. The expectation that everything was and would effortlessly continue to be Just Fine because we were both women, that I would be able to intuit her needs and desires without her needing to communicate with me because we were both women... (Oh, and the pressure to "come out for real" because I kept insisting I was bi, which OBVIOUSLY was a sign I wasn't committed to the relationship or to my queer identity. That wasn't great either.)

And I can understand the desire to have things Magically Work Out in fanfic, but it feels really alienating to me given the experiences I've personally had.